I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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