I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
We named our party play list daddy issues
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize