Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
