Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
