Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
