Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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