the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize