Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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