I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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