We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
