Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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