when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
vagina is talking i cant
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
