Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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