I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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