I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Randomize
