and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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