So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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