Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
