fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
