Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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