is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
