She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
