think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
