Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
