Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
