I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
