There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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