Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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