My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
