did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
