I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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