Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
