I showed him my bush... on skype.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
this hospital has no fireball
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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