Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
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