FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize
