I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
