they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
