sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
