i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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