Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize