i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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