I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
