You smell like stripper and shame
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
