eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
