WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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