I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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