You can't special order awesome
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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