Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
