if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
