Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
