is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
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